I saw some children in the garden yesterday and I watched how naturally they all showed their feelings. If they liked someone, they said so. If they were sad, they cried, released it, and were then happy again. It was refreshing to watch the honest expressions.
We are at times afraid of being honest and open. Of course, it is to avoid the pain that may come as a result of our honesty. But these walls we create bring pain of their own. We adults have lost such ability to be so totally open. If we were once like that as children, perhaps we could learn, to varying degrees, to be that way again.
If people can't accept our honesty or react in a different way to how we'd hoped, it doesn't matter. What matters is we have told them.
On a personal front, we need to muster the courage to express our feelings honestly. Tell people you love them. Tell them you appreciate them, then you will not have to live with the guilt that is carried if someone they loved has passed and things have gone unsaid.
On the professional side of the coin, sometimes colleagues and leaders become blind to what does and doesn't work. They engage in counterproductive behaviours believing they are doing the right thing. It takes a lot of courage to express our feelings and sometimes we are not always strong enough to do this. So much is held back by pride, apathy, or fear of reprisal or humiliation.
This much I know...we cannot control the reaction of those with whom we share this openness with. It is easy to focus on what we don't like about a person, but we must be sensitive to their needs as well. It wasn't an attack on any individual, merely just sharing the imbalance I felt was happening.
We should never feel guilty for expressing our feelings and we should never make someone else feel guilty if they had found the courage to do so.
To that end, I seek out honest feedback. I genuinely want to know whether my interactions help or hinder the performance of those around me. These feedback help me monitor the vital signs, as in a medical checkup.
While expressing feelings in some relationships may come at a price, I have some other relationships in my life which are now of mature honesty and true quality.
We are at times afraid of being honest and open. Of course, it is to avoid the pain that may come as a result of our honesty. But these walls we create bring pain of their own. We adults have lost such ability to be so totally open. If we were once like that as children, perhaps we could learn, to varying degrees, to be that way again.
If people can't accept our honesty or react in a different way to how we'd hoped, it doesn't matter. What matters is we have told them.
On a personal front, we need to muster the courage to express our feelings honestly. Tell people you love them. Tell them you appreciate them, then you will not have to live with the guilt that is carried if someone they loved has passed and things have gone unsaid.
On the professional side of the coin, sometimes colleagues and leaders become blind to what does and doesn't work. They engage in counterproductive behaviours believing they are doing the right thing. It takes a lot of courage to express our feelings and sometimes we are not always strong enough to do this. So much is held back by pride, apathy, or fear of reprisal or humiliation.
This much I know...we cannot control the reaction of those with whom we share this openness with. It is easy to focus on what we don't like about a person, but we must be sensitive to their needs as well. It wasn't an attack on any individual, merely just sharing the imbalance I felt was happening.
We should never feel guilty for expressing our feelings and we should never make someone else feel guilty if they had found the courage to do so.
To that end, I seek out honest feedback. I genuinely want to know whether my interactions help or hinder the performance of those around me. These feedback help me monitor the vital signs, as in a medical checkup.
While expressing feelings in some relationships may come at a price, I have some other relationships in my life which are now of mature honesty and true quality.
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