1st time parents

After 6 years in primary school preparing for this, ACE finally completed 2 out of his 5 PSLE papers today.

For the past 12 years, as a 1st time parent, I would find myself automatically doings things my parents had done. Some things were good, others were less effective, and some were clearly not good at all.

I am very thankful to my parents for their love and support, which helped me enormously, but in many ways, in spite of the love, I was wounded by some of their mistakes. Healing those wounds has made me a better parent. I know they did their best with the limited knowledge they had regarding what children needed as I, too, was their first child. When parents make mistakes in parenting, it is not because they don't love their children, but because they just don't know a better way.

The portrait of a good coach

"Patrice has mentored many people over the years. She has brought those people higher and higher," Gail announced proudly

No matter what level of leadership we're on, we need a peer, mentior or confidant whom we can trust implicity.

The world is full of people telling other people what to do or thinking they know what's right for others. Great coaches don't tell people what to do.

So how do we find someone to trust? We want someone with whom we can relax and be comfortable. That personm who should be nonjudgmental, must offer absolute integrity of confidentiality and understand our business realim and the demands of leadership.

That person must be a skilled listener.

A good coach ultimately helps us discover the answer within ourselves.

Count blessings - not troubles

"I had the blues because I had no shoes; until upon the street I met a man who had no feet" This inspirational quote was on a laminated poster in Book World Dubai.

We seldom think of what we have but always of what we lack. I have recently begun to count my blessings - not my troubles!

Go out and get 'em

"I will be joining a new company next month," Xiao Hua announce.

Dream jobs don't come to those who sit and wait. The name of the dance is "attitude". It's that positive and active attitude that lands jobs and enhances careers.

Total immersion in our jobs

"My boss doesn't support me. I fear if I continue on, my health will suffer," Nguyen confided in me.

My friend, take it from me: if you don't like the work you're doing or the company you are in, you are headed for trouble. You will eventually transfer that dislike to others and to yourself.

Having a job most suited to our needs and capabilities is improtant. A total immersion in our job is also important. I always try to learn all I can about what I am doing. I also learn all I can about why I am doing what I do.

I am not content just to do my job day after day. I keep reaching toward achievement. My greatest happiness comes from knowing that I have done a good job.

The shocking opening price

"I have worked out the pricing and it looks high," Lay Ling started. In Lay Ling's view, the greater the shock of the entry price the more effective the tactic.

I love every minute of a negotiation.

For some people, if they are buying, they go in low -really low and going in high - really high - if they are selling.

It is a fact of negotiating life that the majority of us will not persist with what we come to believe are unrealistic demands. We will sooner back off than persist. But in general, if our shocking or tough opening is credible it has a good chance of forming the basis of the negotiation, so we should open with the toughest credible opening we can think of.

without purpose, life has no meaning

"People ask, What does it mean to be a hero? I define heroes as those who do ordinary things but in an extraordinary time,"reflected Joseph Pfeifer - Chief of Counterterrorism and emergency preparedness, NYFD. "That's what the fire fighters did. They went up and did ordinary things. Ordinary things, but it was at this extraordinary time."

He who has a why to live, can bear with almost any how.

Without purpose, our life has no meaning. it is all but impossible to be fully engaged. To be extraordinary. With purpose, people do amazing things: good, smart, productive things, unprecedented things.

Opportunity is not the same as action

"Our next big thing in Singapore is going to be huge," Anthony declared, giving a hint of what he's about to launch.

Opportunity is not the same as action. Predicting is 1 thing, doing something about it is quite another.

The "cool"man is seldom real

Today is September the 11.

10 years after 9/11.

Not being able to cry is not one of my problems. My eyes well up during a sad or emotional scene in a movie. I know this doesn't sound professional, but when that happens, I know I am alive.

The "cool"man is very macho, aloof and always in control of his emotions. I feel sorry for a "cool"man, who, of necessity, must hide behind a mask to be real. I fear he's seldom real.

Midlife experience

"I think Benny is having midlife crisis,"Kim pondered.

Everyone will have some type of midlife experience.

By the time most people are 47, they have taken a pretty big hit below the water line - a divorce, a death, betrayal by a trusted friend or colleague, the loss of a job, a health event. These things do tend to make us think about what really matters in our lives.

Public speaking is a necessity

"Would you like to be a speaker at our next conference?" the email from the organiser started.

I realise that public speaking is one of people's greatest fears; most people would rather crawl through a snake-filled swamp than to talk in front of a crowd.

But if you're a remotely successful adult, chances are you've had to speak in public at some point. It might be a sales pitch to a customer. It might be an internal presentation.

We want unhappy customers to complain

"I bought a new Blackberry from Singtel, then I saw it offered in Comex and the weekend ads for a better deal. I have complained to Singtel and I am going to do it again,"Chloe was visibly upset.

Statistics shows that only 5% - or 1 in 20 customers - complain to anyone in Management. For every ONE problem where someone has taken the initiative and perserverance to complain to someone at the top at least 19 other complains are never recorded or reported.

The way I see it, it is important to have UNhappy customers complain. Because by satisfying them, we will raise those customers' loyalty by 50%. Customers who don't complain are the least loyal. They simply go somewhere else instead. Through experience, customers whose complains are quickly resolved are the most loyal.

Not where, but who

"Where is the favourite place you have been to?" Melissa was curious.

People always ask me what my favourite places are in the more than 40 countries I have travelled to. I have many favourites, but as I reflect on why they are my favourites, I discover that it is the people I know in those places that attracts me to them. When you have travelled as much as I have, you come to realise that it is not where you are but who you are with that matters most.

Time is money

"Long queues to buy the 60,000 books on offer at half-price. Mr Mohamad Fahmy ismail, 45, who was there since 9.30am, waited for 3 hours to pay for about 15 books," reported The Straits Times today.

We mortals never seem to have enough time or money. We try to get more of each and start by fearing we will secure neither.

How many times has the word "FREE!" taken our attention?

Time is money to me!