Decision to love

"Firstly, I'll try to change him...that is if he really loves me enough to do so","Jamie revealed. "If he changed for me, I'll be even more loving than before.

I was once told "love isn't an emotion, but a decision."

How very true. The decision to love a person involves a commitment and an investment of energy. When i decide to love, it means that I not only put forth the energy but that I decide to accept the other unconditionally.

Most of us are not accepting of others and do not love withlout conditions. We might more truthfully say "I love you because I can redo, remake, rescue or rearrange this about you. Then when I am finished, you will be so lovable."

This kind of conditional acceptance leads to frustrations and friction, not love. It's so like many to say "I like this about you, but I can't accept these other qualities about you." We don't give people space to be themselves.

I guess what I want to say is that my decision to love means that we quit playing games with each other, withholding love, or using blackmail...that I accept, I give and this becomes the dynamic that creates a new energy and power. I know for myself that without love I am nothing, and without giving my gift of love, I cannot experience the greatest of all joys.